Editorials

Supersize Me, Nintendo!

Miranda L Visser / Jun 24th, 2012 No Comments

If Microsoft released a bigger, bulkier Xbox 360; Or Sony Released a Supersized Playstation 3; If Apple introduced an iPhone that was the same in every respect as their current model except BIGGER… would you buy it?

3DSXL

This is the question Nintendo consumers must ask themselves in the next week. Will they allow Nintendo to pull such a stunt as to make money off of the same exact product, in all of its imperfections, and with some extra?

Derek Zoolander seemed to be showing us a picture of the future when he pulled out his miniscule cellphone in the Zoolander motion picture. Electronics are getting smaller, not the reverse. Buyers want their handheld to device to be just that: HAND HELD! They will even pass up bulkier, more protective cases for the sake of being able to fit the bad boy into their pocket so they can bring it wherever they go.

But this isn’t the first time. Industry watchdogs will remember the DSi XL that was targeted towards older consumers who would find a bigger screen easier to see and a larger unit easier to interface with. Never mind that XL version was released after much more time had passed than the situation we have before us now.

What we have here is a desperate attempt to collect profits by a company that is seeing the writing on the wall. While Nintendo was once the big boy on the field, that is no longer the case. The Nintendo of ten years ago would not have attempted to pull a stunt like this. That drop from excellence is not only the result, but the cause of this catastrophe.

The 3DS XL is bigger than its predecessor by design, primarily, it seems, to accommodate a 90% increase in screen size. But before you gasp in awe at this seeming improvement, it’s wise to note that there is no increase in resolution with this change. If you would like to experience the equivalent of a 3DS XL, follow the instructions below:

Items you will need: Magnifying glass; 3DS; Tape (Optional);

Start up your game of choice.
Set magnifying glass on top of viewing screen(s).
(Optional) Tape in place.

Not very pretty is it?

In addition, no attempt has been made to reconcile complaints about the original 3DS with none of the extra room utilized for placement of another control stick, practically necessary for the style of games offered on the system. Perhaps they will offer another mega-sized attachment that you can spend your hard earned money on separately.

I look forward to seeing whether Nintendo fans will take the bait… or think again.

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Miranda L Visser

Gaming since she dug a NES out of a dumpster down the street from her home as a child, Miranda L Visser contributes to Gaming Illustrated while working on her M.A. in Norway. She dearly misses steak and being able to walk down the street to buy cheap games.