Greg’s Cheers to Gaming: A Man Chooses…His Drink
Greg Johnson / Jan 29th, 2015 No Comments
Throughout time, man has pondered ways to make videogames more enjoyable. Like most things, alcohol was the answer. Greg’s Cheers to Gaming is a series of pieces in which editor Greg Johnson combines gaming with alcohol to make an even more interesting game.
We are now well into the new year and gamers everywhere are clamoring over 2015’s upcoming. Meanwhile, I’m clamoring over new endeavors to get drunk. A Man Chooses…His Drink combines alocohol with Bioshock, the dystopian thriller by 2K Studios.
The entire Bioshock series has given players a multitude of gameplay choices, but none have been more haunting than the systematic destruction or finely orchestrated saving of Little Sisters. This leads to the next choice in game: how drunk will you get?
Somewhere Beyond The Sea
Bioshock is best known for its crazy plot twist, but the game delivered a fully fleshed out experience that challenged gamers. The premise of Bioshock boils down to players finding themselves in control of a nameless protagonist who boarded an ill-fated flight crashed somewhere in the Pacific. The game then unfolds into a mystery-solving thriller. As the unknown hero — or villain — players explore Rapture, an underwater utopia that has taken a sharp turn on Ayn Rand Avenue. Eventually, the city’s fall is explained, the protagonist’s identity revealed, and the player’s choices come to fruition.
The major crux of Bioshock is found in the “little sisters,” a group of genetically changed little girls whose sole purpose is to harvest a sort of gene enhancer called Adam that allows players to buy and enhance powers (i.e. shooting ice from their fingertips). Players are faced with the difficult question of whether to harvest the little sisters in order to gain more Adam or cure them of their state, which yields less Adam but results in periodic rewards as the game progresses. This moral decision impacts the game’s ending, and in A Man Chooses…His Drink, this decision will also impact the player’s liver.
You Don’t F@#% Fontaine, Fontaine F@#%s You
There are two parts to the Bioshock drinking game — elements of gameplay and the little sister decision. Keep in mind that this drinking game can be altered for use with the rest of the series, Bioshock 2, Bioshock Infinite, System Shock, and System Shock 2.
The first part of this game involves Bioshock’s core gameplay, specifically its health/mana bar. Mana is represented by Eve, the energy that allows players to use Adam-based abilities. Like any good action game, there are opportunities to regain health; scattered syringes can be found throughout levels when the situation grows dire.
During gameplay, the silent protagonist must do himself harm to regain health, and so too must players in A Man Chooses…His Drink. This calls for alcohol. Players will need two large jugs of mixed liquor. One jug should contain a red mixed drink, which stands for health. The other jug should contain a blue mixed drink, which represents Eve. As usual, the drink of choice is at the gamer’s digression. The simplest option is a combination of vodka and Kool-aid (Popov makes an excellent vodka). Anytime the protagonist shoots up, so too must players. Simple sips will suffice, as this is sure to be a doozy.
Gamers will also turn each choice into a real-world experience. For every saved sister, enjoy the cool refreshment of lemon-lime water. Be sure to give it plenty of lemon-lime taste, as while it is a reward for making the right moral choice, there must still be the bitter pang of less Adam. For every sister harvested, players must bask in the cool refreshment of Jager. Jagermeister is its own punishment — horrific liquor that bites and stings but provides the reserve needed to complete infanticide.
Is a Man Not Entitled to the Drink from His Cup?
Bioshock is a single-player game, but drinkers can embrace the spirit of community by taking turns at junctions throughout the city. It only heightens the fun when all gamers present are forced to live with the moral choices of those with the power. This could also lead into multiple variations of A Man Chooses…His Drink, which will keep the game lively and stave off the boozies.
The addition of food is almost a must. Items from Bioshock include candy bars, chips, bakery items, coffee and soda. This should help players remain sober and can even be integrated into the game (i.e. partaking of the indicated item when players find them in-game).
The party will be far more interesting by playing the “Would You Kindly” edition of A Man Chooses…His Drink. In this variation, any command that uses the phrase “would you kindly” must be honored, except when it comes to gameplay choices. “Would you kindly get me a drink?”; “Would you kindly slap yourself”; “Would you kindly slap yourself!” This additional rule will keep the world outside of Bioshock lively, but players should establish ground rules first to ensure no cheating occurs.
What I’ve Come To Expect Of You
And offered a drinking game, you did what I’ve come to expect of you: get incredibly drunk. A Man Chooses…His Drink is not for the faint of heart. As always, drink responsibly; this means having food, friends and fun.
Bioshock is still a game on player’s lips, partly due to the wanton success of Bioshock Infinite. Even if not a drinker, Bioshock is worth revisiting if for no other reason than the experience. Now friends, it’s time for us to choose something new, something different, we must choose…to needlessly drink every single bottle of wine in Rapture.
tags: 2K , bioshock , Bioshock drinking game , Cheers to Gaming , Greg Cheers to Gaming , opinion